Last week I wrote about the loss of one of the greatest loves of my life, my German shepherd, Tasha, who was the inspiration for my Downward Dog Mystery Series. Specifically, I wrote about how through her bravery, I learned how to love again. Today I’d like to share some of the lessons she taught me. I actually wrote this to Tasha as we lay in bed together on one of her last nights, but I waited to post it until now. Wherever she is, I hope she doesn’t mind my sharing.
Lessons You Taught Me.
As we lay here together, we both know our time left together is short. Being with you now is a privilege, and it reminds me of all of the lessons you’ve taught me over our past twelve years together.
- I am able to love–and be loved–without condition. I know, it seems like this should be a given, and it probably is. But somehow I needed your presence in my life to prove it to me. This will always be your greatest gift.
- Love is hard–but so very worth it. I feel sorry for people who experience loss and then give up on love. Nothing is more powerful. Nothing is more worth doing. Over and over and over again.
- We all make mistakes. Lord knows, I’ve made plenty, especially in your earlier years. Frankly, my sweet, you made some doozies. It never changed my commitment to you, or yours to me. Not once. There’s incredible beauty in that.
- When you make a friend, you love them for life. You didn’t trust many people, but when you bonded with someone, you did so completely. You never forgot their names, and you recognized them years later. In your last days, those same friends came to see you, some after having not been with you for a very long time. You see, they loved you for life, too.
- It’s never to late to make new lifelong friends. As you aged, you grew sweeter. Your circle of friends broadened. I met some of the best people in my life in the last two years of yours–and all because of you. In those friendships you live on for me.
- You can live with chronic illness and pain and be happy. Both of us have imperfect bodies, but you never complained about yours. You accepted it and were happy in spite of it. I’m still working on that one.
- The mailman is not to be trusted. OK, Sweetie. If you say so. I promise, I’ll keep an eye on him. You can relax now. Your guard dog days are over. You did your job well.
I have a few requests for you as you move on to your next journey.
- Don’t wait for me. I don’t know if there’s a life beyond this one, but if there is, live it. Without regret, without reservation. Enjoy it. Relish it. I will join you when it’s my time. Come get me then, but feel free to forget about me in the meantime.
- That said, if you want to visit, I’ll be here. Writing about you. Thinking about you. Loving you. I am here for you. Always.
- I will be OK without you. That doesn’t at all reduce my love for you. In fact, it shows how very strong that love is. You don’t have to worry about me anymore. You made me strong enough to survive on my own.
Goodbye Puppy Girl, my sweetheart, my love. Thank you for gifting me with almost twelve years of your presence. I will always love you; always miss you. But I am forever grateful for the gift of you in my life.
Tracy Weber
All four books in the Downward Dog Mystery Series are available at booksellers everywhere!
This made me cry. I can so relate with every startement. I don’t think that when Tangos time comes that i will get another. Not only because of finances but because i don’t think my heart can take it.
There’s no right answer, only the right answer for you. For me, my heart couldn’t take NOT getting Ana. But I know hoe much Tango means to you.
Tracy,
That was a beautiful tribute to Tasha dog and the tears are still running down my face. I always think of our Tasha girl when I read about your Tasha. Our Tasha was a rescue and we had her for almost eleven years and she was beautiful and I hope you don’t mind but I’m sending your thoughts to our girl because that’s what we thought about her.
Thank you, Mary. Please share with your Tasha, too.
I am crying so hard as I’m reading this beautiful tribute. Not only does that apply to our animals but to all those we’ve lost. Thanks for your post.
Thank you for reading it.
What a wonderful post and letter to your sweet girl. I can remember laying on the soft ground with Sammie talking about some of the same things. I was able to tell Rufus over several weeks and months, but not until the last week did I tell him he could go without me. Not until then did I say I would be ok, hurt, but ok. These amazing beings called dogs are true miracles in our lives. They touch parts we did not even know we had in our hearts and souls. They teach us lessons we never knew we needed to be taught. Your openness and kindness in sharing this with all of us, that also has to be a lesson your sweet girl taught you. Thanks from the bottom of my heart
I think you’re right. So many lessons she taught me.
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Thank you, Tracy, for gifting us with these beautiful thoughts.
Thanks for reading them!
I knew Tasha well through all the stories told. She is a beauty. I don’t know what it is about our animal spirits that allows for so much love and openness. I do know it is never easy to part with each one.
Thank you for allowing us to hear these words of wisdom.
Thank you, Joan. You were my friend from the beginning with Tasha. Another true treasure in my life.
An amazing tribute to your amazing Tasha. Our wonderful dogs do teach us so much about love and life.
Thank you!
What a beautiful tribute to your Tasha. I am blubbering as I think about the last days of our Angel and Bosley. They were so loved and wonderful companions to us both. They were wombmates who became room mates. We lost Angel almost two years ago and Bosley this past August. My husband passed away on September 9th, so your blog is so emotional for me about loss. Thank you for your eloquent words!
I’m so sorry for your losses. I’m glad my words had meaning for you.
If you are lucky enough to have a spirit dog; one who is here to teach life lessons and guide you on a path or journey then you are truly blessed.
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
Thank you!
Thank you Tracy for yet another wonderful entry in your blog. And thank you for allowing us in to share your heart’s deepest thoughts. Even as I cry I experience great comfort from the words of someone who has experienced the same love and loss as I have.
Thank you, Marihelen.
This made me cry, literally, tears are streaming down my face as I write this. I know the loss of a beloved dog, and I know about starting over with a puppy, in their honor. Beautiful tribute.
Thank you so much for reading it. Animals are such an incredibly powerful part of life.